More Matters about Making Marriage Matter


David failed.  David was unfaithful to God and to his promises.

Bathsheeba failed.  She allowed herself to grant the king’s request.

The affair these two participated in resulted in the death of Bathsheeba’s husband as well as the death of a new born baby.  There were also spiritual implications of their adultery.  These events, recorded in 2 Samuel 11, show the progression of thought and action that lead to David committing this sin with Bathsheeba, leading her to join him in this sin.

  • David stayed in the wrong place. It was the time for kings to go to war, but he stayed home.
  • David looked at the wrong thing.  When he saw Bathseeba, the better choice would be to look away and walk away.
  • David entertained the wrong thoughts.  The rest of the story would never happen if David said, “No” to his thoughts.
  • David took action based on these thoughts.  David took the wrong thoughts and carried them out.  Calling Bathsheeba to himself was definitely the wrong step.  By the way, Bathsheeba’s decision to go to the king and join him was wrong.  Could not she say, “No!”?

March 2012

How can we avoid the sin of David and Bathsheeba?  How can we protect our marriage?  When Nathan comes to David, confronting the king with his sin, Nathan pictures temptation as a friendly traveler stopping to stay awhile.  God tells Cain that sin was a wild beast at the door (Genesis 4).  DON’T open the door.  Focus on your spouse and your marriage.  Here is some advice.

  1. Make your spouse your best friend.
  2. Any friends of the opposite sex should be common friends (friends of both you and your spouse).
  3. Seek captivation from your spouse.  Be thrilled to be with them.
  4. Give exhilaration to your spouse,  (emotionally and sexually).  Seek to please them.
  5. 1Co 7:3-5, “The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”  In other words, have an affair WITH your spouse, NOT someone else.

– Scott

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