I do not know when it began. I do not really know why. But somehow something happened and I think we need to take a second look at what is going on. This morning on the the DJ’s on the radio discussed a video of an engagement. A would be groom produced a movie trailer that helped him propose to his bride to be. The “trailer” ran in the theater where she was at a movie with her brother. On this mornings news there was a story about a soldier who had a major recording and touring band serenade his bride-elect as he proposed. Would-be grooms will not be out-done. They must have the most unique and memorable proposal. Do the young ladies expect such theatrics and over-the-top proposals to win their hearts.
Then comes the wedding. Thousands of dollars on a “theme” at an elaborate venue just so you can show how great your wedding day was. Brides competing to out-do their friends’ weddings.
I have an idea. I have a suggestion for another area of marital competition. I hate to add to the fray, but not really. I am competitive at heart. I suggest that we begin competing with our friends to have the happiest and longest-lasting marriages. I propose not focusing so much on the proposal and the wedding day and focusing more on the relationship and pleasing my wife (husband) daily; as long as we both live. Below are some areas that we can spend time on to Make Marriage Matter:
- Communication: Take time to talk to each other about what is important. Make an effort to say, “I love you” every day.
- Relationship: Keep dating, keep “courting.” Whatever you did to convince that young lady you married to accept you – don’t stop. Whatever you did to convince that young man to hang around and ask you – keep on keeping on. Make your relationship the most important physical and emotional relationship you have – even greater that the one you have with your parents and your children.
- Finances: Do NOT outspend your income! Do NOT live above your means. DO budget! DO set aside money into savings and retirement. There is nothing wrong with living in a small house, driving older or less expensive cars, and wearing clothes off the rack at department stores or even discount stores. Make good financial decisions.
- Commitment: Commit to your marriage. Commit to your spouse. Commit physically – they should be the only one you are ever intimate with. Commit emotionally – they should be the one you confide in. You should be the one they want to and willingly confide in.
- Religion: Study after study demonstrates the importance of joint participation in a religious atmosphere. When God is central in your individual lives and in your marriage you will work to be the person your spouse needs and loves.