Why after Twenty-Seven Years

Maybe you can help me understand. I find difficulty with the recent announcement by Bill and Melinda Gates that they are separating after 27 years of marriage.  They made this statement, “We no longer believe we can grow together as a couple.” Maybe I find this difficult because my paternal grandparents were married nearly 50 years when my grandfather passed away.  Maybe I find this difficult because my maternal grandparents were married over 50 years when my grandmother passed away.  Maybe this is disturbing because my parents have been married 60 years. Maybe I don’t understand because Amy’s parents have been married for over 55 years. Maybe my ignorance of choosing to break up a quarter-of-a-century marriage is because Amy and I will celebrate 32 years this summer and I cannot imaging doing life without her. What ever happened to “for better or for worse?”  What ever happened to making a commitment for life?  Why are so many couples giving up?

I am preaching on families Sunday. Strong families make a church revolutionary in a world of broken promises. How can we keep our marriages together?

Advice for sticking together.

  1. Remember that love is more than a warm emotion.
  2. Love is sacrificial toward the other person.
  3. Love will grow if you will feed it.
  4. Make more deposits in your spouse’s “love bank” than you do withdrawals.
  5. Be the best person you can be for your spouse.
  6. Marriage is not a 50% -50% venture.  My dad taught us that marriage is a 100% venture.  You give 100% to your spouse and anything they give in return is a bonus.
  7. Continue to court your spouse, write love notes, bring flowers, chocolates, or whatever they like as a regular token of love.

– Scott

One thought on “Why after Twenty-Seven Years

  1. Love this Scott. I have been married to Dan for 55 years and would not trade him in for anything. We still disagree, but who doesn’t. Thanks for the reminders and we especially need young people to understand this. We grow with one another, we do not digress. Have a good day.

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